Judgement

I’m often amazed by the general misconceptions created by the world’s history that some people have taken as gold. Majority of human beings have taken what they read or heard, mind you from similarly minded people, and made it their own personal misconceptions.

In my short time on this earth, I have learnt a lot. I have observed a lot. And I have made countless mistakes. I have made deadly assumptions and yes, I have carried misguided misconceptions based on what I now know to be ignorance.

There are many young men and women in this world walking around like they were born in heaven and they have diamonds for breakfast every morning.

Unfortunately, I do not see any one pouring oil into their cereal every morning; I sure do not see anybody with a sewing machine creating their own clothes. It’s appalling to know that there is somebody out in the world teaching their child that you are better because you are this and that.

There was a point in time when being an American was like having a few bars of gold in your pocket, there was a time when being of Russian or Italian descent earned you automatic respect. There was a moment in time being an Afrikaner in South Africa meant automatic Royalty. Just as there was a period in history that being white meant your poop didn’t stink.

Well times changed, the world opinion changed, the favor that fell on that special breed shifted and some mindsets where brought back to the reality of what exactly the world is. In all this, I feel there are a certain number of people who got left behind by the ship of change and tolerance when it set sail.

Everybody is quick to state that racism is alive and well yet we all seem to miss the beast called PREJUDICE. In the English dictionary, the word prejudice has several meanings and I will list just a few.

Prejudice-

1. A. An adverse judgment or opinion formed beforehand or without knowledge or examination of the facts. b. A preconceived preference or idea.

2. The act or state of holding unreasonable preconceived judgments or convictions.

3. Irrational suspicion or hatred of a particular group, race, or religion.

4. Detriment or injury caused to a person by the preconceived, unfavorable conviction of another or others.

In most occurrences, Prejudice is often covered up as ignorance. And in most cases, the most ignorant amongst us are the loudest or feel their opinions should be heard by all.

The world we are living in now is one where the look, face, tone of skin color, accent and nationality are most important. Suddenly being black is accepted if you are American. If you are Indian, tough luck, your only savior may be the little money you or your family owns.

The Indians have been the butt of everybody’s jokes for a very long time yet they have continued to study hard and work hard. In fact most Asians know what it feels like to be treated like a second class citizen purely based on the country of birth. Deemed to not be good enough to hold the true friendships of others based on something that you, as an individual, had no control over.

I guess Africans are shit out of luck.

And you may wonder why I say this, for Africans are amongst the well educated people on earth right now, we hold some of the worlds precious metals in our soils? Yes are also riddled with war, famine, hunger, violent crimes and many other things.

Easy…Africans have the “wrong accent’. This is not my view, but sadly the view of many in the Middle East. It is truly a shocking surprise to some of the desert nomads (because that is truly what they are and it is nothing to be ashamed of) to meet an African who doesn’t smell, who is clean, dresses well, is well mannered, knows more than they do, isn’t occupying an unskilled lowly paid job, has money, is well travelled, well educated and doesn’t sound “African”.

What exactly is an African supposed to sound like? Is there a speech therapist who can answer this for me?

If nationality is all you have to go on. If inheritance money is your source of wealth. If it has taken you 3.5 years to get through a 2 year diploma and your only source of purity or righteousness: I urge you to please be quiet before speaking such vile and pick up a book and do something that will expand your knowledge.

I understand that we cannot trust people on the word go and we often judge others by what we have heard. This is completely and utterly wrong. It will make you look nothing but foolish even to those you are trying to impress. It may sound like a good joke but the truth of it is its stupid. Plain and simple. There is a very thin and invisible line between ignorance and stupidity: be cautious about which you choose to show yourself to. Let every man be equal until they show themselves not to be worthy of your friendship or trust.

There is a lot we could say about each other as a people of the earth. But don’t you dare look down on others who may be less fortunate than you, when you really have nothing but your nationality to begin with. Take your lessons from history; nationality is just a piece of paper. For within your own country there are people who look at you like you are dirt. Yet you still find it in you to do the same?

There one thing I know about Africans though, when they are getting ready to pull one over your head; they give you plenty time to make a peaceful exit.

Although, I often ask myself if the African is to blame for these seemingly misguided conclusions? What is it that the Africans have done that was so bad even other dark skinned humans will not allow them to be brothers?

We are all distant relatives.

Lessons for men

OHHHHHHHEEEEEEEMMMMMGGGEEEEEEE.

I have had the funniest week ever Divas! And I think its about time I join the Badgirls club.

You will not believe what I heard and witnessed. Oh man some Divas have it hard! I mean they got it tough as nails. Does anybody know what it feels like to be caught between a rock and a hard place?

Yep, that’s what some divas are on. It is sad to note that after all the trouble women put themselves through to look good for men, men still think they can just show up, unshaven, dirty, sweaty and overweight. And what is it with growing finger nails guys?

Do you men know how painful getting a wax is? Do you even know the positions assumed for a Brazilian wax? Y’all need to stop and start doing your part at taking care of yourselves because this stops right now. so now women are being subjected to washing your boxers, underwear and socks? Really?

If a man tries to pull that with me, he is going straight to his mother’s house. No time for silliness.

I think we need to address some men out there before they get called out. You know,a little heads up. Guys please don’t front because we all know you need it.

First of all, I need to know who can give these men some kissing and foreplay lessons?a lot of sisters out there are being played in these areas! I mean, why in the world are you lip glossing my lips for? I have a lipgloss in my bag thank you  very much. And use your tongue in my mouth and down under. If a man think he will get a decent lollipop action then he better bring it and return the favour really good.

Don’t men know women talk about these things? So you may be walking around like you are the bomb and we’ll be looking at you like whatever man, keep tracking.

To all the men out there here are a few tips:

ü  We live in the 21^st century, it is accepted to shave your under arms and your privates. If you can’t bring yourself to shave and you know you carry a bush, trim it.

ü  Keep your hair and nails neat.

ü  When you come to see me, please make sure there are no holes in your socks.

ü  Have a job or be at school.

ü  Have your own place. It is unacceptable for you to be over 25 and working and still living with your mother.

ü  Lose the after shave and get friendly with cologne. Visit Red Square for advice.

ü  Please pay your water bill on time so you can shower atleast 2 times a day unless you suffer from B.O

ü  Try not to look like a Christmas tree, check out GQ.

ü  Please keep a fresh and so clean pair of boxers at your house all the time.

ü  Keep your place clean.

ü  Know how to make up your bed.

ü  Know how to cook and do it once a week.

ü  Buy flowers often.

ü  On her birthday, go all out even if she refused you some good good the night before.

ü  She’s your women not your maid. Get your own laundry.

ü  Never ever ask her for money.

ü  Do not show up at her job uninvited.

ü  If you want to get drunk, use you own money. No woman is a cash cow. A man ought to be embarrassed for asking for money to go out from his girlfriend.

ü  Tell no lies, no dog house.

ü  You can talk to your ex, if I can talk to mine.

ü  Plan a romantic getaway for 2.

ü  Call a few times a day, not to complain and fight but just to say hello.

ü  Send that sexy text message, it’s ok.

ü  When we make love, quit getting into the business of stopping for longer than 30seconds. Unlike you, one touch doesn’t get the fire lit.

ü  If you do not know how to do it, do not attempt to make me your experiment. So if you can not rub the clit right, do not try it tonight.

ü  You tongue is more than welcome to go into the cookie for longer than 3seconds.

ü  If you are into anal, please let a diva know BEFORE we jump into bed. So I can bring my vibrator and try it on your butt before we get to mine *wink*

ü  If you have a problem staying hard, let a girl know in advance.

ü  We like laying in your arms but do not try to suffocate a sister.

ü  Just because she’s moaning does not mean she is enjoying it.

ü  Stop asking if she have cum yet….you should know when her body is reacting to the good good.

ü  You job is to satisfy her, so if she says 3 hours, you better stay on it.

ü  There are other positions besides the missionary and doggy style. Check Men’s Health.

ü  No small dicks allowed please.

ü 

ü  Do not embarrass me in public

DiamondDiva

Diva Wisedom

Dear young girls,

When did it become fashionable to sleep around with men of any age? As a woman you have to learn to discriminate, you must know what sort of man you want. But if it pleases you to sleep with a garden boy then that’s ok, just use protection.

 I understand that temptation maybe everywhere and yes I know the “bidnis” is good when you do get it good. Yet I still fail to comprehend that with a pandemic on our hands we still choose to get down like that? As you get a little older you will understand that waiting and scouting out who you give your cookie too is much better that just giving it up anyhow anywhere, unless your aim is to become a teenage mother. Also, as a young sexually active individual you must know that there are things that grown women do to make sure the cookie stays fresh and well (that’s why this cookie business is only recommended for grown folk). You have to visit a gynecologist or your nearest Family planning center or clinic. If you grown up enough to lie down then you should be afraid to face an adult and tell them that you are on the bidnis. Being a grown woman just doesn’t mean getting your period, there are all sorts of other things that you NEED to know, and only a pro will be able to help you. Girl talk can go only so far and usually it’s inaccurate.

I chose to write this letter to y’all young divas because the truth is all the aging divas are pissed off at just how well your game is, although it can sometimes be disrespectful ending up in a whooping (personally I don’t encourage such barbaric behavior but a girl got to do what she thinks is best for her). And they are angry at your pathetic mathematics skills.Anikwati kubala.

Firstly, let’s address the power of 2. A relationship is meant to be 1+1=2 (+9) = 3. But it seems like you have failed in the calculation department. I don’t mind because we all failed in the equation area the first time around.

But the power of 2, generally reflects on your own self esteem and worth. If you get used to being the odd number out, you will attract such self-destructing behavior and treatment from men all your life. You get used to being the spare wheel that you can’t handle being number 1.

All this messes with self respect and the law of attraction. If a man doesn’t respect you enough to make you or treat you as number 1, he doesn’t respect you at all.

1+1 (+9)/1x3x9+2=3+1=3.5 *wink*

Please try and memorize this equation it will be very effective once you understand the laws of nature.

Secondly, we want to know how you can manage to lick a lollipop for 3 straight hour’s non-stop just for a burger, from KFC nogal. The point is not the KFC burger but it’s the 3 hour shift.

How does your jaw manage not to get locked? And are there any classes you would be willing to give so we can catch up with this trend? Yes we’ve tried asking the shims but they are smart enough to realize that if we learn then that will be major competition on their part.

We are willing to pay and not rat you out to your parents.

Another thing, we hear that you prey on men who have been around the block more than a few times? Well word of advice, Swaziland is very small; sooner or later you will be sleeping with somebody your older sister or even your mom has done before. So watch out and stick to your age group. The truth is we  enjoy being cougars but we think of what little you will have left to have fun with if we turned our cougar dial to full blast.

We have a few tips we would like to share in the style department as well. When you have the body for it, flaunt it and if the body fails you, do it gracefully.

·         We respect that you all look up to Nicki Minaj but she doesn’t go out looking like Grace Jones on a daily basis. Perhaps Eva Longoria would be a better style icon or maybe even Beyonce.

·         Please be advised that wearing the same clothes as your crew as if you went crazy on the sale at Mr. Price is so outdated.

·         What makes you stand out as a DIVA is having your own personal style.

·         And never, I mean never do anything for a man, man never noticed. Look good so YOU can feel good. If a man is going to appreciate you; he will appreciate you while wearing a plastic bag.

·         Yes its true men are visual creatures but don’t you dare make it all about them.

·         Keep the makeup subtle and if you will make it dramatic, make sure it’s classy.

·         Always keep your lipstick and lip gloss close by. If you stay ready, you never have to get ready *wink*

·         We like to see cleavage but we are not trying to see all that meat hanging out of your chest! Act right.

·         And converse is reserved for sweat pants on a lazy Saturday, it’s not an everyday thing for us DIVAS.

·         Stop wearing jeans or underwear a size smaller, we know how much trouble it is getting in and out of that plus it causes a yeast infection. If they don’t have anything in your size just keep it moving.

·         Just because he slept with you doesn’t mean he is your man. Be careful the decisions that you make with your body.

·         Sleeping with him is not going to make him your man. Follow the 90 day rule.

·         Always use a condom, bring your own if you can. Prevention is better than treatment.

Remember, Diva rule #1- keep yourself happy at all times.

DiamondDiva

Sound of Music

I was listening to Rihanna's Loud album….I am not sure if I like Rihanna but I like her music. Her music is cocky as hell and that’s alright by me. When I listen to music, after the bass sound, the next best thing is the lyrics then the rest follows. My mom often says they don’t make music like they used to no more. She says they wrote and sang songs that just made you fall in love over and over again; they made music you could dance to not gyrate to. LOL. She says the lyrics were not boastful or angry but rather tender, soft and filled with hope. Unfortunately for her, I’m not sure what she is talking about but I do believe her because Sunday mornings in my mamas kitchen are something out of this world. Marvin Gaye hears what he heard through the grape vine, Patti Labelle doubles down in her six inch high heels in my mind, Luther Vandross tell of an Impossible dream, Gladys Knight and the pips, the Temptations. The list is long and the music is so good.

I listen to music that either means nothing because I don’t want to think at the time being or music that brings my sexy back.

I don’t understand how a Diva can get down to music that really just is worth wiping your behind with, no offense to those who love that type music, especially the type that sells the cookie as nothing but just a thing to be had. My grandmother once said as you grow and become mature, your taste matures as well. I’m sure some songs are great to have a boogie down too but you’ll never catch me with that on my iPod…if that mess isn’t homegrown, it will be a cold day in hell before I buy or listen to it.

And what about abomrapper who are forever going on about hustling and getting paid and making it??

What’s up with that?? After how many years you are still hustling? Still trying to get paid? Still trying to make it? How old are you again? Please, get a real job, settle down and save.

Take a lesson from the greats…they came in talked about hustling. And they hustled; they talked about making it and getting paid…and guess what? They were riding the wave of success and getting paid…and now? They make music that they can relate to in their heads and makes sense to people who are on their page because they progressed with their hustle.

Rihanna didn’t just become an overnight celebrity, she had to work for it, she sang for many years before even getting a break and she took it. Missy Elliot was turned down so many times but she kept at it. Jay-z wasn’t satisfied with just rapping, he knew a day would come when he had to hang up the mic and grow up, so he diversified is empire. Think like a squirrel, go for the nut but there 30 different ways to get it.

I’m not a musician and will never be, yet I have always believed in music that makes sense to the listener but first to the singer/writer. This is a rule applied to life everywhere.

The people who are selling you music for the moment are taking advantage of your own stupidity. Then again, it all depends on your level of maturity as an individual so I am not mad at some of you.

The point is to PROGRESS with your hustle. Why are you still stuck in the same place you were at 5 years ago? Stop pointing fingers at people. Everyone around you is responsible for your failures but you. Each time you blame someone else for your delayed progression you are simply ignoring the person responsible for that; YOU. And by not accepting responsibility for your mistakes and your wrongs, you will remain right where you are because you will have no will, no zeal to work for better, to achieve a little more than you already have. Achievement doesn’t have to come in a form of a cheque with 7 zeros! Recognize where you are and accept it then aim for the step above.

It is not realistic to be at level one and shoot for level seven! Step by step and then opportunities will present themselves. You may get blessed while you on level 3 and be given an opportunity to get an express ticket to level five! You have to work nonetheless though.

I have heard and seen almost all the excuses people come up with to support their reasons for failure, and I have done it too. I have been there, and I still have a few more excuses left for why things may or not work out. Although if you work hard you will reap the rewards. And can you please stop blaming God for why things haven’t worked out. He blessed you with a gift or skill but you are keeping it looked up somewhere. Even worse when you have perfected it and yet you refuse to push your mind over.

Depend on nobody.

Souljah boy used to flip burgers at Burger King to save money for studio time, who are you to sit on your behind all day ranting on twitter and irritating the hell out of us on BBM? Yes your are gifted and you are perfecting your skill but God can only do so much.

The amount of time you spend on facebook…you can actually hold down a second job with that time.

If you keep living it up on credit, if you always spending somebody else’s money to cushion your high maintainance Diva lifestyle then you don’t get my point. And it’s sad you may never get it. But one thing is for sure, there will come a day when you realize that your money maker is getting expired.

Your aspirations are priceless.

DiamondDiva

Economic Truth

In tough economic times like the ones the country is facing it is wise for a Diva to start re-evaluating her position in life. It’s actually a good thing to always be checking out how slow or fast your are moving or even you are moving at all. You have to change the game plan, don’t lower your standards just change your approach. We need to start having budgets. It’s true that a Diva can’t ball like one used to because the truth is those sugar daddies are also feeling the financial crunch and are no longer looking for takers or spenders but are looking for contributors of either financial worth or otherwise.

They are now looking for partners who have the ability to make the money not just spend it.

And competition is tough out there, those women in Jozi are miles ahead and they stay on top of it. *smile*.Just like Divas are no longer looking for one night stands but more of a permanent situations.

So ladies, how does one go about being that Diva that they all wish they had?

ü  Get a job with career opportunities that go beyond the job you are employed to do. We all have to start somewhere.

ü  Pray hard.

ü  Go back to school, start a business, join an active charity in your community…basically get and stay busy.

ü  Maintain your GPA; I know some divas are not particularly blessed in that area but try. Watch the news and surprise him by your wittiness. Plus when you converse with all his well-educated buddies and their bimbos, you will sound a bit bright and abreast with what’s going on around you.

ü  Start paying an interest in what he does for a living. Feed his ego from time to time but accept no nuisance.

ü  Take extra good care of your appearance and looks. This doesn’t mean breaking the bank. If you don’t have a natural senses of style please consult a pro or a friend. APPEARANCE IS EVERYTHING.

ü  Ask of less of his money. If he wants to give it to you he will, don’t guilt or shame him into doing so.

ü  Instead of going out, try cooking a meal at home. If you can’t cook or bake you must learn. A maid is a luxury not a must 9except if you are a rich Arab kid). If KFC feeds your man, they might as well have a room for him there *wink*

ü  If both of you used to go out to the best spots in town and live it up, don’t stop, just get less drunk. Remember, it’s about lifestyle.

ü  Develop a sudden interest in sports, don’t be over zealous its ghetto but just keep your eyes and ears open.

ü  Start reading. A local newspaper would be a safe start.

ü  Have a hobby besides steady racking up air miles or shopping sprees.

ü  Be an individual, have a personality. Know who you are. Laugh hard.

ü  Wear matching underwear even on your period.

ü  And always go hard and try to be extremely good at anything you put your head to.

ü  Enough with the foul language already. We know you can do it but we are not trying to hear it

ü  Keep a low profile.

This may look like a long list but it is worth it. In fact, most Divas have half of this list already in the bag. There are no guarantees that a man will stay with you or be faithful even after all your extra efforts but it is good training for the man who will finally be the ONE. It will attract a few worthy suitors that is for sure. And always keep it real, that the most important part in being you. If he can see that you are always you in any situation, he can roll with that for life.

If you want to implement change into your life, do it because you crave it, do it because you want to and you are not being forced into it. That way, you will be happy with the change you made whether or not he stays with you. You must always be the reason why you do something until he marries you, and then you can start to compromise.

 We don’t want any soap operas. Keep it drama free but don’t let him ride you over the head.

When you embark on a new adventure, always have a goal. No matter how minute it may seem, for some Divas the goal is, “I want him to look back at our relationship and wish he hadn’t dogged me out”. That’s motivation enough to be that DIVA. Keep in mind he isn’t look for a mother, he has one at home.

Men like to brag about what their women are doing, it’s a fact. He can brag about the booty all day long but the punch line is what his woman is doing to get paper and how bright she is. The standard, “she’s staying at home”, just doesn’t cut it anymore, to him or his buddies. This little bragging feeds his ego to the point of a natural high.

There is nothing more unsexy than a lazy, uninspired, always out to get some type of woman

Just like we don’t like a lazy man who doesn’t do nothing all day except lay up in our house and play PS games and can’t even afford to help you out with a bill. The same goes for the guys.

 DiamondDiva